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Recognizing broken …

It has been a long journey of self-discovery and IMG_0846dropping all of those perfect ideals.   What I didn’t realize was just how broken I really was.  Life has a funny way of helping us move forward.  But many of us go through life with a mask of hurt, pain, anger or any other word we want to associate our burdens or self-identification.

I did what is expected as being a mom we continue to cook clean and dive into our children’s activities and if that isn’t enough, we go on to organize the booster clubs and stepping into leadership or so I thought.   What I didn’t recognize was that I was losing myself, I forgot to connect to my heart and do what is best for everyone so life could become balanced.   No was never an option, the alarm always alerted me.  It was time to do more.IMG_0802 (2)

Misunderstandings, assumptions, words spoken of regret and mis-interpretations, false expectations appearing real, as parents we dream of what “perfect family” should be but in reality most of us are far from this environment.  It looks good on the outside – but is it really?  Do you speak up for fear of rejection?   When i spoke up judgement was placed.   Or do i accept the small morsels given?   It’s a NO WIN situation.

Some of us dove into a career with head strong urgency,IMG_1501 though I chose motherhood with no regrets.   Striving to do more and be more, applies to both areas.  Long days and weeks away from family or obligations was not a problem since others would be stepping up and taking care of everything.   I am important and needed or so I thought.

Slapping the smile on my face and trudging forward is what I did best.  One day an angel interrupted me and suggested something different.   Deep down I knew I was angry, deep down I know of heartache and pain, deep down I knew I needed something ~ but what?

IMG_1180I tried therapy … same ole same old; tell the woes of unhappiness, reliving those painful defining moments then what, was there a resolve, no!   No next steps, no relief, no sympathy, no solution.  Tried another therapist to help me see the forest through the trees.  Ugh, again the same story telling, nodding and taking notes, but nothing to grab on to that will get me out of my own head.

Children throw themselves into life and speak their mind and you hear adults say “out of the mouths of babes”. As adults we hold back and don’t speak of wrongs against us, we are chaise for having a voice and saying we don’t like, we don’t want to, we don’t agree with the words you spoke to us and continue on.   Little by little our spirit is broken, little by little our heart cries out, little by little we stop trying.   When do you stop the Ferris wheel and make a plea for a different life?

We may be broken and still successful, can be connected and a resource for many, but deep down we know.  Need to get out of our head and the logical side of life and find that inner child that screams for attention.   Find that spark, that free spirit who leaps out of bed no matter the age and dive into life, and live from the heart!

My angel game me the gift of life.  My angel gave me the gift of love.  My angel has no idea how truly grateful I am.  He saved my life.  I am able to drop all of those preconceived ideas of who I need to be, who I am supposed to be and I found ME!   Digging deep didn’t happen overnight but the experience and the transformational opportunity was worth the ride!   I am alive!  I am connected to my heart; I am able to see the forest through the trees.  Let me help you!   Let me come from a place of love and show you just how beautiful you truly are.  Let me be your angel!

I love life ~ I love you and have a gift for you to open ~ it’s your choice!

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My 90 day journey …

This journey started years ago.   My goal with the ninety days was to ignite my passion and find out what makes me tick and to push me to find my true calling.

During this journey every button was pushed, everything of comfort was challenged and life is forever changed.  I never did more things in a twenty-four-hour period, never connected with strangers now known as family. I have never opened up in relationships, to family and friends that I have done on such deep levels.   My wish is that my children actually get to know me and the individual I have uncovered during this journey.   I have opened my heart, opened my home and found what it is to truly be connected.  No apologies, no I am sorry; there is nothing better than love and true acceptance!

I know who I am IMG_5076– I know what I want  – I know what I need – I know what I will no longer accept for me in every aspect of my life.   It’s about true connection, giving from the heart.  Its about leaving judgement behind and complete and utter acceptance of who I am.   Knowing my boundaries and tolerance.

Finding Kathy, the beautiful heart of love to give and share; knowing my passion, talents and strengths are enough.   Knowing I am stronger than I gave myself credit for and to stop playing small.   I have passion when I get out of my head and connect with my heart and when I am truly connected with my heart I am powerful!   I am at peace and it radiates through my smile and it doesn’t have to be pasted on for the world, but it is true and genuine.

IMG_4948I have found sexy!   I am who I am and that sexy doesn’t have to be defined by a man beside me or what they have to say about your body. It is not defined as cleavage and tight fitting clothing and to be a true essence of your true self means finding your soul and owning it!  It is being comfortable in your own skin and not defined by the words of others.   I don’t have to step into the expectations of others to be my true authentic self.

Passionate so envelops who I am.   My world is filled with color, rich and vibrant.   My world is filled with nature, not the calm path but those filled with rocks, trails, water, altitude, sweat and fulfillment.   My passionate side speaks of love, connection, music, love of giving, photography, art and dance!    Come get to know me ~ it’s been a fun journey.

My creativity was dormant for years as other  fascites of my life took center state. IIMG_5514.JPG thought I didn’t need creativity as I look back, there are glimmers of it trying to jump out and speak to me however, those impulses were not strong or ignored.   If my creative side stood its ground, life as I knew it would have been filled with abundance, laughter and love instead of always trying to fit into someone else’s box.   There are no boundaries only those we impose on ourselves.

As this journey has evolved I stepped into leadership with challenges and some areas of ease and comfort.   The experience has enriched and recognizing life is now is ultimately a gift of balance.   When you step into your true power, define yourself magic happens at the end of your comfort zone.

I chose to live life out loud.   I chose to fill my life with color, pictures, life with music, connections, friendships, relationships and LOVE!    I chose to be a sexy passionate creative leader

I welcome you to explore your journey and welcome conversations that open up the possibilities for you, your family and the world!   I am forever grateful.

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Humbled …

My day of reflection began being humbled ~ I am a control freak.   I love to be in charge, I know the best way to do things but sometimes life has a funny way of reminding us that we need to take a step back and ask for help.

My Saturday evening started by volunteering atIMG_1312 the local theater.   Time well spent talking engaging and supporting the community, however, little did I realize that the same place I parked time and time again would fail me.   Leaving on a high and walking to my car that’s when life laughed at me.   My car was parked or so I thought was parked in my same ole same ole spot – wrong!    If you are local to my little town,  they are also control freaks and they love for people to pay for parking everywhere.   Well, when two controllers butt heads, one ends up losing – this time it was me!     My car was towed and I could not get it the morning…. Ugh.    Getting home was my imminent task.   I could Uber or Lyft – but that would require me to download something and set up accounts or call a friend.

IMG_1315 (2)Its takes a lot for me to ask for help, but at this point in time, I needed to step back and ask for help!    I humbled myself or so it felt that way.  I was embarrassed and felt really foolish placing this call, but wow – there was no judgement, no ridicule, nothing just genuine friendship.   Without going into explanation or details, the first statement was OF COURSE I will be right there!   How many times have we held back calling people, engaging because we are afraid of what the others will say?   There are so many individuals / friends / family out there – will able and ready to help but we are scared to put ourselves out there for fear of what???

As a health and wellness coach so many people are afraid to step out of there comfort zone, be humbled – take that step that would totally make a difference and ask for help!    We all need to ask for help on occasion, I could not have gotten a ride home or a ride to the towing company this morning if I didn’t put myself out there and say HELP!    What are you looking to accomplish?  IMG_1299.JPG Getting healthy is a statement that is vague description of what you want but I ask you to dig a little deeper.   What does that look like?   Being specific – I was at the corner of Church and Gay; I needed to tell my friend where I was standing for that ride home.  You need to own it – where are you in your journey?   This will give me a spring board of where we need to start, its education guidance and a partnership on your journey to totally wellness.  Its ok to be humble and ask!!! I did ~ will you?

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Shopping List

grocery-shoppingOn a recent Saturday adventure to the Italian Market in Philadelphia I was totally surprised at the abundance of colorful fruits and vegetables available.   If I lived closer to this neighborhood I would be there every weekend.

Where do you start when creating your shopping list?   Do you create your menu first, then put together your grocery list or do you have a well-stocked pantry?  Then head to the store to see what amazing vegetables and create something unique.    When my children were young I would start with the menu, then check the pantry and fill in where I needed.    The more I explore cooking and being open to what is presented and knowing what will fuel my body and keep it lean and energized, I approach shopping and cooking differently.    I welcome you to explore your shopping list with a new sense of fun!

I have at least 2-3 books I am reading at time.  img_5851-2 I want to find out what makes our bodies function at optimal performance.    After a year of exploration, I have found that some staples in my diet were not helping me.   Some of these food items caused inflammation, acne, bloated belly just to name a few of the aliments I confronted.      My journey took me through the grocery store – any nutritionist will tell you that eating around the grocery store is the way to success.     The isles are our pitfalls, filled with processed, chemically altered products all contributing to excess weight gain.   But a closer look is needed on the perimeter walls of that grocery store.     Our bodies are designed to be efficient and by efficient we need to fuel it constantly with meals and snacks to keep it running.    Many of my clients take better care of their cars than their bodies – they arrive at the gym without eating, they don’t feel like cooking at night so they pop a bowl of popcorn and consider it dinner.   Is that working for you?    Success in your shopping needs a little education.    We need to keep our body running like a luxury car, continued care, continued fuel and hydration.   We need to switch to smaller portions, with a continuous supply of food.   When we get the right foods, the body’s blood sugar and insulin does not spike.img_5797-2

What are the right foods for our bodies?   What should our shopping list look like?    We need to take a look at the glycemic index of food, also known as blood glucose or blood sugar levels.   Look for foods that have a low glycemic number GI – these promote weight loss!    Cucumbers, romaine lettuce, radishes, celery have a lower GI than corn, carrots or peas, which have high sugar.    Bagels, white potatoes, rice cakes and pasta all elevate your blood sugar and makes it difficult to lose weight.   If your ultimate goal is weight loss, keep your shopping list rich in colors in vegetables, limit the intake of your fruit and increase your lean proteins will make a slimmer waistline!    What are you going to do differently in 2017 – it starts with your shopping list!

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Define Yourself

December is upon us, which means shopping, parties filled with rich foods, cookie exchanges and pretty cocktails.   Will you let the holidays define your waistline?   Will your exercise or daily routine be in jeopardy during this month.    It’s time to define yourself –  What do you want to do differently this month – why wait until January to get a jump start on your health.

What can you do today to be successful during this stress filled month?   Make yourself a priority!  It starts with you … life becomes much easier when we feel great – but how do we do that?    It has been a year of growth for me.    Weight loss, healthy boundaries, healthy eating habits and not overdoing it in the gym.    One of my client conversations included the “I want” statement … and she continued with vague statements such as I want to feel better, I want to have more endurance, I want my clothes to fit better.   In order to define yourself –  you need to quantify what you want!   Feel better – how, by doing what?   No more pain, where is the pain and what are you doing to make it better, does that mean walking or physical therapy – don’t wait!  Be clear if endurance is your goal – and how do you measure it?   Set a goal to be able to walk a 3-mile trail by May, what do you have to start doing today to get to that goal?   MOVE!

Weight loss and healthy eating should go hand in hand.  It should be slow and steady and it’s all about what you put in your mouth – do you eat well during the five-day work week and then throw everything out the door when it comes Saturday and Sundays?   That was my first mistake!   Our bodies are designed to support a seven-day a week eating habit.   Make eating a priority, which means breakfast, lunch and dinner plus 3 healthy snacks – once your body recognizes you are taking care of it, it will take care of you.

Healthy boundaries are recognizing what brings stress to our life, then reduce it – yes, that is easier said than done.   We make lists, though we don’t make lists to define our triggers, what stresses us out and then we feel depleted when everything is not checked off that list.  Our expectations of ourselves don’t include time to relax or drink a cup of tea.  Does baking six different kinds of cookies and shopping for everyone really need to be done?    Are there individuals that just push every button and we fall back on our old ways to meet their expectations?       If you are having a hard time coming up with what stresses you ask your best friend – they can tell you!

As a personal trainer I see a lot of individuals overdoing it in the gym and think it will be beneficial.    You don’t need to spend more than an hour a day in the gym, yet I see individuals who feel the need to push through pain with the mentality no pain no gain.   Does that attitude define you?     Set realistic expectations of a workout whether it’s in a gym or a brisk walk.    The fresh air will do you wonders!

Look at this December as a time to start your new list, WHAT DEFINES YOU.   Set specific and clear expectations for yourself that gives you permission to sit for 20 minutes when you get home from work and relax with a cup of tea. Make walking 40 minutes your goal with you ultimately attaining 10,000 steps by the new year and the sleep component of 7 hours.     You will leap into the holidays with a fresh outlook on me time!